morpheus_zero

for those of you who actually care...

2005-11-10T20:28:22Z

The Slow Dancer
Deliberate Gentle Love Dreamer (DGLDm)

Steady, reliable, and cradling her tenderly. Take a deep breath, and let it out real easy...you are The Slow Dancer.

Your focus is love, not sex, and for your age, you have average experience. But you're a great, thoughtful guy, and your love life improves every year. There's also a powerful elimination process working in your favor: most Playboy types get stuck raising unwanted kids before you even begin settling down. The women left over will be hot and yours. Your ideal woman is someone intimate, intelligent, and very supportive.

Your exact opposite:
The Hornivore

Random Brutal Sex Master

While you're not exactly the life of the party, you do thrive in small groups of smart people. Your circle of friends is extra tight and it's HIGHLY likely they're just like you. You appreciate symmetry in relationships.

ALWAYS AVOID: The Battleaxe

CONSIDER: The Maid of Honor or The Sonnet

Link: The 32-Type Dating Test by OkCupid - Free Online Dating.
My profile name: natedasnake

p.s. I DON'T HAVE ROSY CHEEKS GODDAMMIT

morpheus_zero @ 2005-11-03T21:32:00

2005-11-04T05:32:19Z

so, before:

after:

oh, and a light burned out, so I put in a single sylvania silverstar bulb (the "nicer" ones that I got for cheap) in its place... left lightbulb is now "upgraded." sadly, you can't tell much of a difference. =(

RRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

2005-11-01T00:50:21Z

Oct 31, 2005 1:52 PM

Delivery exception

VENTURA, CA

Customer not available or business closed

3:46 AM

On FedEx vehicle for delivery

VENTURA, CA

Oct 28, 2005 11:30 AM

At local FedEx facility

VENTURA, CA

Scheduled for delivery next business day

9:07 AM

Delivery exception

VENTURA, CA

Damaged, handling per shipper instructions

6:46 AM

On FedEx vehicle for delivery

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE!?

morpheus_zero @ 2005-10-18T02:44:00

2005-10-18T09:45:56Z

OMG GUESS WHAT!?!?!?

AWESOME!!!!!!
I fucking love mexicans!!!!!

why the fuuuuuuck am I doing this

2005-10-12T21:41:27Z

1) Bold what is true about you.
2) Italicize what you wish was true about you.
3) Add one true thing about you to the end of the list.
4) Tag five LJ friends.

* I miss somebody right now.
* I don't watch much TV these days.
* I own lots of books.
* I wear glasses or contact lenses.
* I love to play video games. (only sometimes now, sadly)
* I've tried marijuana.
* I've watched porn movies. (duhhhh)
* I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.
* I believe honesty is usually always the best policy.
* I curse sometimes. As opposed to constantly.
* I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.
* I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.
* I have broken someone's bones.
* I have a secret that I am ashamed to reveal.
* I hate the rain.
* I'm paranoid at times.
* I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
* I need/want money right now.
* I love sushi. (wish I did, for emiry)
* I talk really, really fast.
* I have fresh breath in the morning.
* I have long hair.
* I have lost money in Las Vegas.
* I have at least one sibling. (define "sibling")
* I was born in a country outside of the U.S.
* I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyelashes in the past.
* I couldn't survive without Caller I.D.
* I like the way that I look. (most of the time)
* I have lied to a good friend in the last 6 months.
* I am usually pessimistic.
* I have a lot of mood swings.
* I think prostitution should be legalized. (....whyy nott...)
* I slept with a roommate. (ouch..)
* I have a hidden talent. (many!)
* I'm always hyper no matter how much sugar I have.
* I have a lot of friends.
* I have pecked someone of the same sex.
* I enjoy talking on the phone.
* I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
* I love to shop and/or window shop.
* I'm obsessed with my Xanga or Livejournal.
* I don't hate anyone. I dislike them.
* I'm a pretty good dancer.
* I'm completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother.
* I have a cell phone.
* I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
* I've rejected someone before. (also sort of)
* I currently like/love someone. (yes, I miss her now too. she's close though.)
* I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.
* I want to have children in the future. (probably... but if they cross me I WILL CRUSH THEM)
* I have changed a diaper before.
* I've called the cops on a friend before.
* I'm not allergic to anything. (afaik)
* I have a lot to learn. (I'd like to think not, but it's true)
* I am shy around the opposite sex.
* I’m online 24/7, even as an away message. (more like 23/6 but same idea)
* I have at least 5 away messages saved.
* I have tried alcohol or drugs before.
* I have made a move on a friend's significant other or crush in the past.
* I own the "South Park" movie.
* I have avoided assignments at work/school to be on Xanga or Livejournal.
* I enjoy some country music.
* I would die for my best friends. (possibly)
* I'm obsessive, and often a perfectionist. (I would say more of a perfectionist but not obsessive. it's complicated)
* I have used my sexuality to advance my career.
* Halloween is awesome because you get free candy.
* I have dated a close friend's ex.
* I am happy at this moment.
* I’m obsessed with guys. (argh! freudian slip)
* Democrat.
* Conservative Republican.
* I am punk rockish.
* I go for older guys, not younger. (tehehehe, you tease you!)
* I study for tests most of the time.
* I tie my shoelaces differently from anyone I’ve ever met. (well that's a weird one..)
* I can work on a car. (need some tools first, but it's inevitable)
* I love my job.
* I am comfortable with who I am right now.
* I have more than just my ears pierced.
* I walk barefoot wherever I can.
* I have jumped off a bridge.
* I love sea turtles.
* I spend ridiculous amounts of money on makeup.
* I plan on achieving a major goal/dream.
* I am proficient on a musical instrument.
* I hate office jobs.
* I went to college out of state.
* I am adopted.
* I am a pyro. (only when I'm around pascal)
* I have thrown up from crying too much.
* I have been intentionally hurt by people that I loved.
* I fall for the worst people and have been hurt every time.
* I adore bright colors.
* I usually like covers better than originals. (only sometimes)
* I hate chain theme restaurants like Applebees and TGIFridays. (haven't been to many)
* I can pick up things with my toes.
* I can't whistle.
* I have ridden/owned a horse. (don't axe.)
* I still have every journal I’ve ever written in. (...?)
* I talk in my sleep.
* I've often thought that I was born in the wrong century.
* I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distractions.
* I wear a toe ring.
* I have a tattoo.
* I can't stand at LEAST one person that I work with.
* I am a caffeine junkie.
* I am completely tree-huggy spiritual, and I'm not ashamed at all.
* If I knew I would get away with it, I would commit at least one murder.
* I cosplayed or know what cosplaying is. (wikipedia.com... do it.)
* I have been to over 15 conventions.
* I will collect anything, and the more nonsensical, the better.
* I enjoy a nice glass of wine with dinner.
* I'm an artist. (WAY out of pracitce, though. I can still put it on my resume, right?)
* I am ambidextrous.
* I sleep with so many stuffed animals, I can hardly fit on my bed.
* If it weren't for having to see other people naked, I'd live in a nudist colony.
* I have terrible teeth. (not denture territory, but bad)
* I hate my toes.
* I did this Meme even though I wasn't tagged by the person who took it before me. (meme?)
* I have more friends on the internet than in real life.
* I have lived in either three different states or countries.
* I am extremely flexible.
* I love hugs more than kisses. (about the same)
* I want to own my own business.
* I smoke.
* I spend way too much time on the computer than on anything else.
* Nobody has ever said I'm normal.
* Sad movies, games, fics and the like can cause a trickle of tears every now and then.
* I am proficient in the use of many types firearms and combat weapons. (proficient? well... whatever. scary ain't it?)
* I like the way women look in stylized men's suits. *cough*
* I don't like it when people are unpleased or seem unpleased with me. (isn't this natural?)
* I have been described as a dreamer or likely to have my head up in the clouds. (more than once, but those days were a long time ago)
* I have played strip poker with someone else before. (can you really do this with just yourself?)
* I have had emotional problems for which I have sought professional help.
* I believe in ghosts and the paranormal.
* I can't stand being alone. (there are exceptions)
* I have at least one obsession at any given time. (usually two or three, but they don't change)
* I weigh myself, pee/poo, and then weigh myself again.
* I consistently spend way too much money on obsessions-of-the-moment.
* I'm a judgmental asshole. (quite the opposite, I'd like to think)
* I'm a HUGE drama-queen.
* I have traveled on more than one continent. (here and Europe)
* I sometimes wish my father would just disappear.
* I need people to tell me I'm good at something in order to feel that I am.
* I am a Libertarian.
* I can speak more than one language. (1 1/2)
* I can fall asleep even if the whole room is as noisy as it can be. (depends how tired I am..)
* I would rather read than watch TV.
* I like reading fact more than fiction.
* I have pulled an all-nighter on an assignment I was given a month to do.
* I have no piercings.
* I have spent the night in a train station or other public place.
* I have been so upset over my physical gender that I cried.
* I once spent Christmas completely alone because there was a miscommunication on which parent was supposed to have me that night. (ouch..)
* I've been married and am now divorced.
* There have been times when I have wondered "Why was I born?" and may/may not have cried over it.
* I like most animals better than most people.
* I own a collection of retro games consoles.
* The thought of physical exercise makes me shiver.
* I have hit someone with a dead fish.
* I have written/read erotic stories. (haven't gotten that far, haha)
* I am compulsively honest. (this is not too useful any more)
* I was born with a congenital birth defect that has never been repaired.
* I have danced topless in front of dozens of complete strangers. And not been ashamed.
* I have gone from wishing I was a boy to revelling in being a girl to feeling like a boy again in the span of five minutes, and not cared a whit for my actual sex. (BAHAHAH)
* I am unashamedly bisexual, and have different motivations for my desires for different genders.
* I sometimes won't sleep a whole night or eat a whole day because I forget to.
* I find it impossible to get to sleep without some kind of music on.
* I dislike milk. (HOW can you not like milk?!)
* I obsessively wash my hands. (or rather, should I say, very thoroughly)
* I always carry something significant around with me.
* Sometimes I'd rather wear a wig in day-to-day life than use my own hair.
* I've pushed myself to become more self-aware and thereby more aware of others.
* Even though I live on my own I still cry sometimes because I miss my mother.
* I hand typed all the HTML tags in this document. (jesus, that would be annoying)
* I've liked something which a majority of people claimed was either bad or weird. And I stick by my fucking choice!!! (the m coupe! hahahahaha)
* I have been clinically dead for a brief period of time.
* Instead of feeling sympathy/empathy with people and their problems, I simply become annoyed. (this happens, but it is very rare)
* I am a virgin.
* I participate/have participated in auto drag races and won. (nathan's maxima: 3, gagi's motorcycle: 1, PAST A COP... booyakasha)
* I do not 'get' most comedy acts.
* I don't think strippers are money-greedy or slutty for dancing. (I just think that the guys who want to bang them are retarded)
* I don't like to chew gum.
* I am obsessed with history/historical things and can't wait for someone to build a time machine so I can be the first to use it. (they're cool, but... not obsessed with 'em. sorry.)
* I can never remember for the life of me where I parked the car.
* Had the TEEN ANGST thing going for at least 2-3 years. (OMG ANGST!??!)
* I wish people would be more empathic and honest with each other.
* I play Dungeons and Dragons weekly.
* I love to sing.
* I want to live in my mother's basement when I grow up.
* I have a custom-built computer. (built AND overclocked by yours truly, only ~3 weeks old... see "consistantly spend way too much money on obsessions...")
* I want to have a certain someone's babies, even though there's a 0% possiblity of ever achieving it.
* Have an old crush/friend, that you haven't seen/spoken to in a years, send you an email suddenly, even though you never gave him/her your email address.
* Own more than 7 video games. (something like 25-30, but I don't play them very often)
* I joined Livejournal when I was 11.
* I think I was Asian in a past life.
* I spend way too much time and effort on material things
* I think that these.... "meme"s are useful in some way, shape or form

BAHAHAHA I suck.

headshot

2005-10-04T07:36:25Z

Sep 29, 2005
8:03 PM

Picked up

BLOOMINGTON, CA

11:26 PM

Arrived at FedEx location

BLOOMINGTON, CA

Sep 30, 2005
1:35 AM

Departed FedEx location

BLOOMINGTON, CA

6:57 AM

On FedEx vehicle for delivery

VENTURA, CA

12:09 PM

Delivery exception

VENTURA, CA

Delivery delayed, scheduled for next business day

Oct 3, 2005

2:14 AM

On FedEx vehicle for delivery

VENTURA, CA

10:55 PM

Delivery exception

VENTURA, CA

Delivery delayed, scheduled for next business day

morpheus_zero @ 2005-09-26T11:46:00

2005-09-26T18:55:19Z

Attached Devices

# IP Address Device Name MAC Address
1 192.168.0.2 INFINITY 00:11:24:8c:b2:34
2 192.168.0.3 EXNIHILO 00:0c:76:15:d7:32
3 192.168.0.4 MORPHEUS 00:0e:35:4f:b1:8b
4 192.168.0.5 MORPHEUSZERO 00:11:09:e9:04:b0
5 192.168.0.6 MCOMP 00:90:4b:f8:e5:2c
6 192.168.0.8 VALUED-664B84C7 00:0f:66:f3:a4:52

my router's getting quite a workout now.

...

we're such nerds. :p

list of things I have yet to indulge in:

-large-ish network hard drive (would also act as a printer server)
-nice logitech wireless (bluetooth?) keyboard (cuz the one I have now is a pos)
-any mods for my car (besides shift knob, hahahahaa)
-...gas?
-black ipod nano (cuz it's not "lookatmeimayuppie" white, and it holds less and will be less functional and I lick balls)
-heatsink, low latency ram for o/c and another 6800gt
-a nice headset w/microphone
-sony dsc-t1 5mp digital (badass) camera
-a bunch of expensive dual layer dvd+rs to test out my new drive
-possibly some more ram for my laptop
-a desk or something to put all my shit in my room
-your mother

think that's about it. if I had all that shit I would be pretty much good to go, feeling pretty badass and totally satisfied.

...whatever, gotta go to class.

morpheus_zero @ 2005-09-07T22:55:00

2005-09-08T05:56:27Z

morpheus_zero @ 2005-08-21T12:31:00

2005-08-21T19:31:42Z

OMGKNEEGROW!!!

Here it be:

interior:

3 liter V6, 5 speed--190hp, 0-60 in about 7 flat. I love this car.

did I say "kneegrow?"

VQ POWAHH--pascal style.

morpheus_zero @ 2005-05-24T10:43:00

2005-05-24T17:44:37Z

24121 COMM 100 Fund Speech Comm B-

22343 GERM 106 German Level II B

21507 PHYX 106 Col Phyx: Mechanics & Heat B-

22220 PSYC 165 Career & Life Planning A-

GPA
Current Term: 13.000
13.000
13.000
38.30
2.94

aw, still missed a 3.0..
schweet though.

morpheus_zero @ 2005-04-14T22:41:00

2005-04-15T05:41:23Z

"The Center for Disease Control has issued a warning about a new virulent strain of sexually transmitted disease.

This disease is contracted through dangerous and high-risk behavior. Thedisease is called Gonorrhea Lectim (pronounced "gonna re-elect him"). Many victims have contracted it after having been screwed for the past 4 years, in spite of having taken measures to protect themselves from this especially troublesome disease.

Cognitive sequellae of individuals infected with Gonorrhea Lectim include,
but are not limited to: Anti-social personality disorder traits; delusions
of grandeur with a distinct messianic flavor; chronic mangling of the
English language; extreme cognitive dissonance; inability to incorporate new information; pronounced xenophobia; inability to accept responsibility for actions; exceptional cowardice masked by acts of misplaced bravado;uncontrolled facial smirking; ignorance of geography and history; tendencies toward creating evangelical theocracies; and a strong propensity for categorical, all-or nothing behavior.

The disease is sweeping Washington. Naturalists and epidemiologists are
amazed and baffled that this malignant disease originated only a few years ago in a Texas Bush."

morpheus_zero @ 2005-04-05T06:12:00

2005-04-05T13:13:52Z

I just saw a man on TV who would flare his nostrils each time he spoke a stressed syllable. It was one of the strangest things I've ever seen.

...yeah, yeah, I'll finish up the post below, but it might be awhile, 'cuz I have a lot of verk.

morpheus_zero @ 2005-04-02T15:48:00

2005-04-02T23:49:03Z

What's interesting today is how many people's morals and beliefs come out of movies.

From a very early age we were taught that life was this blissful thing, and that we had nothing but happiness ahead of us. And we pretty much did. We were read fairytales, where the enchanting prince chased after the beautiful princess, and then they lived happily after ever. The only thing that mattered to the prince was the princess. Because she was beautiful. He had no other cares in the world. Life had no responsibilities, no worries. We didn't really have any pressure to look good (well, the little girls wanted to be princesses, but they would be satisfied with a little pink dress and sometimes a magic wand), no bills to pay, just nothing to do when no one else could play. That was our biggest worry. And even then, we found stupid stuff. We'd go and play with our Legos and toy cars (some of us longer than others, ahem). We'd go flip the lights on and off. We'd stare at the wall, for chrissake. We hadn't a single fucking worry in the world. We were taught that life was like this.

But as you get older, you mature. That is, you gain self-restraint; tolerance. Life starts getting harder, and you realize that, of course, there is no happily ever after. Most of this stems from you becoming more aware that these things are needed. Next time you see a fat kid walking down the hall, you bite your tongue, because you realize that no matter what your parents tell you, you actually can become the bad guy. Regular people can actually do things that are wrong. It's not just the evil stepmother (even though sometimes it is). You start to notice more and more that there is no real line between right and wrong, good and bad, and that there are really no good or bad people. You begin to realize more and more that these are the things you tell little kids, so they still have a positive outlook on life, and they can (hopefully) discern the people who will molest them from the people they can play with.

I think some people think that they know everything by the time they get to college, or graduate college. They think that they're at their maturity peak. And I also think that they're making a big, stupid, shithead mistake. If you think you know everything, then you won't take anything else in. You will never know everything. As you get older you will always begin to accept more things, you will always gain maturity.

What makes me laugh even more, though, is how eager people are to say that they love someone else. For not years, or decades, or centuries, but probably aeons we have tried to figure out what "love" is. Ask any and all of your friends to define love for you and how you know you're in love. They will all give you different answers. And guess what? They will all be a composite of things that they've seen in movies, read in books, and heard from other people, perhaps with a personal touch thrown in occasionally.

Love is just a word, shitheads. It's a word. Nothing more, nothing less. There is no "universal" love, no matter what anyone tells you. It's an ideal. No one can possibly achieve what the movies tell you love is, just like no one can possibly achieve looking like a movie star (when they're in a movie). Just like no one can possibly shoot or get the ladies as well as James Bond. Sorry, Pierce, but you're not that attractive. People see these movies and think that they're realistic; that they portray life. I've got news for you. Aside from the ones that are "based on real stories" and/or have no moral or lessons, none of them portray real life. It's unbelievable that people watch these things, whose only purpose is to entertain them and make money, and run their lives based upon them! It's absolutely appalling. Can you think of anything more senseless?

But wait, let's get back on this subject of love. I said that it's just a word. That wasn't entirely true--love is whatever you want it to be. It has no guidelines. But please, for god's sake, don't ever base your definition of love on what a movie tells you. There is no requirement that you have to know "all of someone's smiles" in order to love them, there's no catch that requires you not to cheat on them (although there should be =), there's nothing that says it even has to be about a person. Something else is that people think that sexual attraction can or should have nothing to do with love. That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. You can figure out if you love someone or you're just sexually attracted to them, right? Don't be stupid and mistake (or even define) one as the other.
That is, don't be an idiot. If your definition of love is sexual attraction, then you're either really stupid, are unable to understand emotional attachment, or you need to be hit upside the head with something heavy (or probably all of the above).

Love is whatever you want it to be. As you get more and more mature, your definition of love will change and refine. There will always be the girl or guy who says that they love someone and you think "are you kidding me? there's no way." Well, they're either fooling themselves (which is quite possible), or you just have a more highly refined definition of love. Either way, you look down on them and see them as (much) less mature than you.

Anyway, I almost forgot that I was writing this.

In conclusion, don't be a moron. Don't believe the movies. Don't believe the books. If they're not true, then it's stupid to "learn" from them, as you're "learning" false things. Take all the advice you get from everyone with a grain of salt. But just a small one. I mean, except for me.

I'll try to update this later, because I wanted to write a whole lot more.

We'll see.

morpheus_zero @ 2005-03-06T03:24:00

2005-03-06T11:28:16Z

HBO: "The upcoming movie will be rated 'G.' "
Me: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
.
.
.
.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

(beat)

*scrabbles for remote*

morpheus_zero @ 2005-02-19T06:03:00

2005-02-19T14:03:43Z

you all suck for not commenting =\

yummy, fresh quotes.

2005-02-04T09:21:22Z

Morfius265: you wish you had a what?
dodgyjew: and m5 engine to stick in my car
Morfius265: oh
dodgyjew: yeah
Morfius265: I wish you had one to stick up your ass
dodgyjew: man i would be fast
Morfius265: S62--the new buttplug
dodgyjew: i would def buy one

-------------------------------------------------------

Numba 1 wongA: ok man
Numba 1 wongA: i think i better sleep
Numba 1 wongA: thanks for the mp3/the hating on [david] feriante

-------------------------------------------------------

Morfius265: ok, so get this
Morfius265: luke (the bitchy/needy/nerdy black girl who seems to think she's in charge of everyone)
Morfius265: came out four times in a row
Morfius265: in the previous hour
Morfius265: telling me to turn down the tv
Morfius265: and swearing at me
Morfius265: now that's not the funny part
Morfius265: the funny part is that after the first time I had the TV muted

-------------------------------------------------------

FusedToast: i need to start drinking i think
FusedToast: well, start drinking more
FusedToast: drunk is awesome

morpheus_zero @ 2004-12-14T19:44:00

2004-12-15T03:46:03Z

Since Emily doesn't have a noise filter like I do, I thought I'd post some "remastered" pictures of her.. hehe

There ya go... she's purrty isn't she?

morpheus_zero @ 2004-12-02T13:05:00

2004-12-02T21:05:59Z

Another thing from Dan that I thought might be interesting; I'll prolly post this in the xanga too:

Post a memory of me.
It can be anything you want, just so long as it
happened.

Then post this to your journal.
See what people remember
about you.

morpheus_zero @ 2004-12-02T01:01:00

2004-12-02T09:24:38Z

STOLEN FROM DAN :p

THREE THINGS I AM WEARING RIGHT NOW
1) A blue T-shirt... think it's a Quicksilver one...
2) Nice, soft boxers... ahh
3) Pair of socks

THINGS ON MY DESK
1) Klipsch Promedia 4.1 speakers
2) CD/DVD/game collection
3) Laptop... sometimes

THREE THINGS I WANT TO
DO BEFORE I DIE
1) Marry Emily (duh)
2) Own many nice cars ;)
3) Get a nice house somewhere in a nice neighborhood.. somewhere. Wow, that was lame.

THREE GOOD WAYS TO DESCRIBE MY PERSONALITY
1) I've got a true conscience
2) I can laugh at just about anything
3) I'm nocturnal... mwahaha

THREE BAD THINGS ABOUT MY PERSONALITY
1) People I can truly relate to are hard to come by
2) I've got a slight case of the addictive personality
3) Little things bother me

THREE PARTS OF MY
HERITAGE
1) I'm 3/8 German. Whoo!
2) My mom's dad has had enough triple-bypass heart surgeries that it is now illegal for anyone to perform ANYthing on his heart (we're talking 5+ here folks)
3) I've taken on a small bit of what I hate most about my mom

THREE THINGS I LIKE ABOUT MY BODY
1) My eyes, that's a good one
2) I've got decent abs and damn strong legs by now
3) Mr. Happy... gotta like him *glare...* (Dan...)

THREE THINGS I DON'T LIKE
ABOUT MY BODY
1) I have a connected chest... basically, my ribcage is connected together by... well, by god knows what, and that means my chest is a little concave, and my ribs jut out a little more than they're supposed to at the bottom; furthermore, I have previously had trouble taking full breaths under greuling conditions, but that's gone away awhile ago.
2) I get foot cramps a lot!
3) My feet always seem to be cold.

THREE THINGS
MOST PEOPLE DON'T KNOW ABOUT ME
1) I can be a pretty good writer when I want to be. I guess you could put that under "cocky."
2) I'm very ponderous. And the fact that I sometimes question things does not imply that I dislike them or distrust them.
3) I'm very loyal.

THREE THINGS I SAY THE MOST
1) Heh, heh, all riiight.
2) I'm sure I told you about... (caught myself and have exterminated this one though, it was damn annoying)
3) Just a plain "what the fuck" when it's necessary.

THREE PLACES I WANT TO GO
1) Germany, to see and drive on ze cherman owtobarn, of course with one of the aforementioned cars, and, of course, with aforementioned wife.
2) Japan, yeah.
3) France works too, but really only for my beautiful wife.

THREE NAMES THAT I GO BY
1) Natedogg
2) Nate the Snake (doesn't rhyme, I know)
3) Natepants (don't ask...)

THREE SCREEN NAMES I HAVE
HAD
1) Morfius265
2) Morpheus_Zero
3) Morpheus001 (call me uncreative, if that's a word... or even if it's not, but I'll bitch you out in that case)

morpheus_zero @ 2004-11-17T18:12:00

2004-11-18T02:13:07Z

TOP 10 REASONS WHY SEX AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT IS NOT AN ADVISABLE FORM OF PROCREATION
10. Penile length contraction:
According to the relativistic theory of length contraction, this is an inevitable consequence of performing sex at the speed of light. An average penis of length 13cm traveling at 99% the speed of light will contract down to a length of only 1.8cm (this is about the same length as the smallest functional penis officially recorded). At the speed of light, length contraction leads to an interesting paradox in which the penis seems to have no length at all, but is still managing to have sex somehow.

9. Penile black hole formation:
At the speed of light, relativity also predicts that the penis will attain infinite mass, essentially becoming a black hole. When its owner realises that his penis has turned into a black hole, he will become profoundly depressed and overcome by a feeling of loss. John Bobbitt would understand; but Mr Bobbitt had his penis sewn back on, whereas a penis lost to a black hole is a penis lost forever.

8. Penis vaporisation:
If the penis is not lost to a black hole, it will be lost to the uncaring force of friction. A penis traveling in and out of a vagina at close to the speed of light will be subjected to enormous resistive forces. Since resistive forces are proportional to speed, this will heat up the penis enormously. The temperature of the resulting internal environment will be so high that the penis molecules will actually undergo a phase transition into a gas, vaporising the penis almost instantaneously.

7. Relativistic flaming semen:
In the unlikely event that a vaporised penis can perform ejaculation, then the relativistic semen will create enormous air resistance, burst into flames almost instantaneously, and generate enormous impact forces. These forces will be sufficient to pierce a small hole straight through a woman's lower torso, just like a speeding bullet, only incinerating the surrounding tissue as it passes through.

6. Time-dilated necrophilia:
Unfortunately, the woman will probably be dead before ejaculation anyway. According to the relativistic theory of time dilation, then if the man is to actually thrust in and out at a speed infinitesimally close to the speed of light, then from his point of view, his partner will be ageing extremely quickly, and will be long dead before he ejaculates. Legally, he will be committing necrophilia.

5. Lack of visual appeal:
Time-dilated necrophilia, flaming relativistic ejaculation and penile black hole formation are all very dramatic, but unfortunately they don't translate well onto the big screen. In reality, relativistic sex would only last for a fraction of a second, and would appear as a sort of muddy grayish white smudge, since the eye merges all images together at such high speeds. This is probably not visually appealing enough to make a porn-at-the-speed-of-light series out of.

4. Religious values:
Certain branches of Christianity would view porn-at-the-speed-of-light immoral anyway. It's in the Bible.

3. Property damage:
A penis is made up of a collection of charged molecules, and accelerating charged molecules emit radiation. To accelerate charged penis molecules up to the speed of light in a single thrust requires enormous acceleration. This will produce a frequency and intensity of radiation similar to that produced by a small nuclear explosion. It may be worth hiring out a hotel room if you don't want your own room obliterated.

2. Deafening sonic booms:
As a penis accelerates up to the speed of light, it will inevitably surpass the sound barrier, producing deafening sonic booms with every inward and outward thrust. If the neighbours haven’t already been woken by your moaning, they will be now. Or then again maybe not, because they will be conveniently deafened and unable to hear you.

1. Excessive dietary requirements:
The amount of energy required to accelerate an average person up to 99% the speed of light for a single inward thrust is approximately equal to 16 million billion kilojoules. This is equivalent to the amount of energy gained by consuming 78 trillion weetbix. But 78 trillion weetbix will increase an average person’s mass by approximately 1.2 trillion kilograms, requiring them to eat even more weetbix just to accelerate this additional load up to the speed of light. Nine out of ten nutritionists may recommend weetbix, but this is slightly more than the recommended daily intake.

-from sexualphysics.com

morpheus_zero @ 2004-11-15T19:13:00

2004-11-16T03:13:22Z

*drool*

morpheus_zero @ 2004-10-25T02:16:00

2004-10-25T11:46:12Z

...So, I'm stuck here, feeling very alone, thinking about the last woman I'll ever love, and the best God-given gift I'll ever receive.
They happen to be, of course, one and the same. I haven't ever had anything to be more thankful for in my life. I'll never have a
purely fairy-tale relationship with her, and no one will ever have such a relationship. They may hold themselves up to this standard
sometimes, but when it comes down to the reality of things, there are so many different fairy-tale ideologies that it is statistically
impossible for there to be a single relationship that entails them all. Especially when it's realistically and humanely impossible to
have a relationship that entails even one of them.

Right now I've got the most beautiful girl that I've ever seen. When I think about everything I like about her, she seems perfect, as
I can think of things in every "girl-criteria" category. She's gorgeous, she's smart, she's engaging, fun to be around, she adores me,
she's very feminine, shares my sense of humor (note that I didn't say she has a "great sense of humor," as this is just a buzz-phrase
whose semantical equivalent is what I said), and even her family likes me. On paper--that is, theoretically--while this is a strange
word to use, she IS perfect. However, over time It's become more and more apparent to me that she is NOT perfect. While at first glance
she looks like an absolute goddess, upon further inspection she does have imperfections. While she is very smart, which is a must for me,
she does sometimes do some not-so-smart things, and while I know she absolutely adores me, she does on occasion do some things that aren't
too considerate.

There. It's out there. I said it. But the most important thing I've done since I met her, I've almost taken for granted. I stopped
liking her for her perfection when I realized that she was not perfect. I started loving her for who she was. For all of her flaws.
For the fact that she needed someone to be there for her sometimes, that she did have her fair share of insecurities (however ridiculous
they may be ;) and she's really just a normal girl at heart. I've always known that I could never really find anyone better than her,
but it's at the point at which that's irrelevant, because I wouldn't want anyone "better" even if I COULD find them. I don't want anyone
BUT her. Our relationship has its problems, and neither of us are perfect, but I really wouldn't have it any other way. I feel to this
very day that I'm incredibly lucky to have even met her, because she's different from the other girls. She's different from the typical
girl. And right now, I know where I'm going with this, but I don't know how to get there in a neat manner, so I'll just say it:
This woman is the best thing that's ever happened to me. Whenever she's around me I feel like nothing else matters (think Metallica),
and whenever I get a taste of what it's like to be with her again, I find it increasingly hard to let go, and right now I'm just waiting
for the point at which I'll never have to let go again. She and I have our share of problems, but because of the way we feel about each
other, we'll always get through them. I've maintained up until now that she is, in entirety, perfect. I feel like I run a great
risk in telling her this, but she's not. She's not perfect, and neither am I or you. I want her to know, however, that no matter how
imperfect she is or feels, I still love her exactly how I've expressed in the past. I'll always love her as if I perceive her as perfect.
I'll always perceive her the same way.

She's what I have, she's more than I deserve, and she's more than I'll ever ask for. But I want her to know that I'll love her like I do
no matter what, no matter how old and withering we get. And I'll always love her for who she is, not who she was/my memory of her, or the
perfect image I had of her.

All I feel right now is how much I miss her, and how happy I am that I have her.
I love you, Emily. Thank you for being a part of me.

morpheus_zero @ 2004-10-21T10:02:00

2004-10-21T17:18:07Z

I'm watching Life is Beautiful, it's a really weird movie; the kind that makes me want to change the channel and keep watching at the same time. It's simultaneously hilarious and deeply depressing. For those of you who don't know, it's about a father and a son, both Jewish, going through the Holocaust, the whole time the father's pretending it's a game for the kid. I don't know what happens in the end.

It's really a great movie, though... cute yet sad.

On a... well... a very different note... Emily's coming up to see me in a day or two (yay! :-D) and... well... it's about time. ;)

Love you babe..

morpheus_zero @ 2004-10-10T14:26:00

2004-10-10T21:27:29Z

I think E36 with M parallel replicas is the way to go now...

...SICK.

Case Closed!

2004-09-29T08:25:52Z

So, I'm watching this stupid cartoon thing, right?
And I'm eating mediocre cupcakes made by the one and only La Kenya, who also informed me today, 1 1/2 months after I came here, that I shouldn't say "God damn," because it's "very offensive to her." (she's not religious) Anyone here who knows me (and you all pretty much do) will know that it does not take me 90 days to exclaim something like "goddammit!"
*smack*

So, yeah. Some idiot uh-hosted my golf cart drift "picture." That sucks.

That's about it. I'm having fun. Whee!

-Natedogg (ha.)